Today marks my wife’s birthday and a little over a year that we have been married. With so much to celebrate, I can’t help but pause and reflect.
Because of fear, I almost didn’t introduce myself to this woman who now means more to me than anything. At the risk of sharing too much, I tell this story because I know there are many of you out there with missed opportunities because of hesitation or fear. Whether you’ve experienced financial or psychological fears, I hope my story will help you push through those feelings and take the next risk.
I attended Providence College for three and a half years without ever seeing Whitney. Second semester of senior year, I first saw her at the gym wearing an old softball t-shirt. Despite every bit of me wanting to go up to her and introduce myself, I didn’t. I couldn’t bring myself to face the possibility of rejection.
Looking back, I wonder, what if I had never seen her again after the gym? I had never seen her before, who is to say I would again? What if she was there just visiting a friend? That easily could have been the first and last time I saw her and I never even took a shot.
Missed opportunity number one.
As chance would have it, it wasn’t long before I saw Whitney again. At a party, a mutual friend was with me and was ready to make an introduction. You know back in middle school when you were walking up to a girl ready to ask her to dance and then last minute, hard pivot away? Well, I did that several times on my way to introduce myself. The whole night went by and eventually her and her friends left without me saying a word.
Missed opportunity number two.
The next time I saw Whitney, I was with my group of friends and she was with hers. My friends weren’t going to let me walk away without saying anything… again. I was initially awkward and quiet and not being myself. Whether she was interested, or just being nice, we continued talking all night with me eventually becoming myself. Thankfully, in this case, third time was a charm. I was able to get her number and a little over a year ago today, her hand in marriage.
Fear of being uncomfortable had control over me. Thinking about how close I came to letting her come into and out of my life, without even a word, is more powerful than that fear. Our story serves as my helpful reminder when I need the extra push to get outside my comfort zone.
Have you ever been in a situation like this? What have you potentially missed out on because of fear? Fear of taking a pay cut to follow your passion. Fear of using vacation days you’ve earned. Fear of investing because you’re unsure of the markets. Fear of facing your debt.
I understand how costly being trapped by fear can be. I was lucky to get three chances, when most of us only get one.
Understanding the potential gain has helped make me so much more comfortable with taking risks.
Risks, like moving across the country and leaving family and friends. I think of how much I have grown from experiencing different cities and meeting new friends who are now scattered all across the country.
Or, the biggest risk yet, leaving a comfortable job and income to follow my passion and start my own business.
As I write this, I am a week into the launch of Driven Wealth Management and I couldn’t be more excited. While we help young professionals and business owners develop financial plans, part of our work involves helping them shift their mindset. Particularly, their mindset around personal development and money. Similar to when my fears held me back, a lot of us have fears around money that are trapping us and preventing us from having the confidence to take action. I love that the plans we create help eliminate these fears and empower members to take control of their future.
I couldn’t have done any of this without Whitney. She has pushed me to pursue this dream and has supported me the entire way to help make it a reality. There are a lot more challenges ahead that I know are going to feel incredibly uncomfortable, and I am ready to take them on. I can’t wait to help our members do the same.
Happy birthday to Whitney and thank you to everyone for reading and coming on the ride with us!
Please get in touch if you’re ready for a plan that eliminates the financial fears you feel are holding you back.